Sobota
Je mi zle. Fakt příšerně zle. Můj nejdražší mi sobčácky předal svoji angínu a teď vesele hopká po světě, zatímco já hniju v práci s horečkou, nateklýma mandlema a bolestí snad každého svalu v těle.
Nechala jsem se napsat ráno na hlídání výstavy, protože tam se nemusí mluvit. Mluvení mi totiž způsobuje konstantní bolest, což u průvodce je maličko problém.
Nechala jsem se napsat ráno na hlídání výstavy, protože tam se nemusí mluvit. Mluvení mi totiž způsobuje konstantní bolest, což u průvodce je maličko problém.
Výstava byla hrozně miloučká, až na debilní vlaštovku, která tam vletěla s návštěvníky dveřmi a pak nemohla trefit ven, přestože jsem pootvírala všechny okna.
Po střídání se modlím, aby ty dvojky vyšly na někoho jiného. A taky, že jo.
Na první jedničce sice posmrkávám a sípu, ale všechno svižně ubíhá. Na konci jsem dokonce dostala dýško. A to historicky největší dýško jaké jsem kdy na hradě dostala (ano i na české památky občas zavítá někdo, kdo ví jak se to dělá ve světě) – nafasovala jsem stovku s hromadou díků. Takže bomba, dneska bude na večeři.
Druhá prohlídka je ještě o trošičku lepší, přestože jsem tentokrát žádné dýško nedostala.
Jednak je tam plno a to já mám radši. A jednak je tam taková skupinka postarších osob. Pán má na krku foťák a potom co je vpustím do expozice se přijde dovolit, že by rád udělal pár fotek, přestože jsem je už na začátku upozornila, že je to povolené. Je sympatický a ujišťuje mě, že blesk zůstane vypnutý. A tak celou prohlídku fotí. Převážně mě.
Na konci okruhu se společně zakecáme a zjistím, že to je bývalý kastelán ze Lnářů, dává mi navštívenku, že máme ve Lnářích říct, že nás posílá a prohlídku budeme mít zadarmo. Taky se ptá jakou mám e-mailovou adresu, že mi prý pošle fotky. Konečně budu mít důkaz, že tady pilně pracuju.
Na konec se i se zbytkem skupinky hrozně chválí, že jsem nejlepší průvodkyně jakou kdy potkali (červenám se), protože mám hezký ústní projev, jsem zábavná, milá a nepoužívám plevelná slovíčka ani nedělám EEE (prý to počítali).
Za mě říkám, že to je prostě skvělý den. (Fotky z prohlídky dodám, hned jak je budu mít.)
Neděle
Dneska je mi hůř než včera. Mandle sice odopuchly, ale cosi škaredého mi sedlo na průdušky a plíce a když se rozkašlu vypadá to, že ty protivné dýchací vaky vyflusnu. Ráno to oznamuju na průvodcovně s tím, že dneska pro mě druhý okruh nepadá v úvahu ani náhodou, neumluvila bych to. Naštěstí nechodí tolik lidí, všichni pravděpodobně vyspávají kocovinu po včerejších ohňostrojích. Pro forma odvedu prohlídku ve dvanáct, abych si nepřipadala, že mě platí za nicnedělání. Odpoledne na bránu, kde mám po pěti minutách chuť vraždit. Sice dneska chodí míň lidí, ale za to samí blbci.
„Proč jako máme platit?“
„A co v tom areálu máte tak extra, že se za něj platí?“
„Mě dejte snížený, já jsem ještě dítě.“
„Mě dejte snížené, já jsem důchodce. Občanku vám nedám, musíte mi věřit.“
„Mě dejte snížený. Jako jako prokázat nárok na slevu. Vám to říkám, ne?“
„Chcete mi říct, že řecká sobota byla jenom v sobotu? To tady dneska nic není?“
A tak furt pryč. Mám sto chuť zabouchnout bránu a nikoho dovnitř nepustit. Dokoukala jsem dva filmy a ve vysílačce málem přeslechla hlášení o tom, že padla. Cestou přes nádvoří si připadám jak idiot. V mikině, s palestinou kolem krku, chrchlaje na všechny strany, šířím mor. Mufloni se poflakujou kolem v tílkách a kraťasích a lížou zmrzliny. Mám chuť jim je klopit na zem, protože vím, že určitě každý třetí zahodí obal od zmrzky na zem a budou to uklízet průvodci. (Když jem nemocná mám nechutně pesimistickou a zapšklou náladu. A chuť vraždit každého kdo se cítí líp než já… Což jsou všichni.)
Ještě, že mám příští týden volno.
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